Kitchen

So today is day two of our kitchen revamp. Yesterday, after a long afternoon search, we finally found the tiles we wanted to put on the wall. We ended up getting floor tiles! Less shiny and more robust than the usual kitchen tiles. I hope it works! Almost anything is better than the icky color that the tiles are now.


I was telling Herman that I'm glad I didn't realize how much work was going to go into fixing this kitchen up. The dust, oh my stars, the dust!! As you can see right here....

it was not a misty day... it was the dust. Which obviously penetrated the house right up to the eaves. I have now "cleaned" downstairs, but I guess the rest of the week will be spent dusting and dusting and dusting...


This is our outdoor kitchen. Sounds pretty fancy, hey? I did actually cook on here this evening, on an electric burner. Thank goodness for good weather!

The hot water was off downstairs, so Herman had to lug pails of hot water up and down the stairs for me so I could dust a little. And I had to get the water from my soup from the hose outside:-). Later tonight this will all be covered up with plastic and tomorrow will be a day of rest.
I'm just hoping nobody will come by and steal the pans and tupperware that is still stored in the cupboards!

Night out

My brother in law came sneaking in tonight at 6.45 p.m. and offered us tickets to the theater.
So we got all dressed up and had a lovely unexpected night out.


These two men kept me in stitches during their acting and moved me to tears with this song...
You're going to have to take my word for it that the lyrics are pretty good!

Home improvement

Even though Herman has been sick, he has been able to do some home improvement. Like the painting of the wall that I mentioned yesterday. And the hanging up of these ethiopian paintings.
I'm grateful for him, for the handy man he is. Grateful that he has enough energy to fiddle around in his own time making our house that much more ours.

How it is with Herman

We sent out an e-mail the other day, telling people that things were going better with Herman, so I figure I owe the bloggy world the same favor!
Gone are the days of Herman lying flat out, incapable of doing anything. He's now up and about, able to dishes (HALLELUJAH!), cook food (AMEN!) and he has even mustered up the energy to hang up some cupboards in our bedroom (lookin' good!).
Seriously though, he has done the things mentioned above, but it's not like he's overflowing with energy. The prednisone is keeping him up at night and jittery during the day, and after doing something he needs to take a break. But, thank goodness, things really are improving slowly but surely.
I love my hubby and I'm ever so glad he's getting better!

And, as a small postscript; also gone are the days of "a new day has farted", as Herman once stated.

Gotta love his sense of humor!

Short note

Well people, I am in the library blogging because our internet is out at home. Not something that I could really use as this moment as Herman is usually the computer guy and he's pretty much too sick to do anything right now. Even his handwriting is suffering due to the weakness caused by this damned colitis.

For those of you who want the medical update: Hermans hospital visit went well, but the aftermath is unpleasant, painful and worrying. He's on Prednison but it's not kicking in yet. Marinda has some kind of cream for her infection which, she tells me, is even effective against pimples. Lord knows why she wanted to test it on those, but she did! So she's a happy camper. Tristan has tendonitis by his ankle and has to go to a podiatrist (right word?) and fysiotherapist.
I am ok except for aches and pains due to digging out a colleagues back yard, which was meant to be a fun, binding experience with all my colleagues. Next time I will stop by for the lovely cakes and snacks and leaving the hard work to others!

Anyhow.... I will do my best to log on here and there, whenever the opportunity presents itself to keep my lifeline to the world open!

Meanwhile I have a ton of chores to do, so I will go do them.

Today

Today is the first day of possibly a whole weekend of no kids. Hmmm.... wonder what we'll do with our time!
Although we will have to take it easy. Unfortunately, during our vacation, Hermans colitis acted up quite badly making him feel very tired and also giving him a lot of pain. So he's had to call in sick and he's having to take things real slow.
But despite that, some time without kids is not something to be taken lightly! It's great to watch whatever I want on tv, to eat food that the kids don't like, and generally enjoy the peace and quiet. Especially knowing that the kids are doing something that they enjoy doing. Tristan is spending a couple of days with a friend from his old school. He's really been looking forward to that. And Marinda watched a movie with two friends who are over from Russia and is now staying with one of my friends in Utrecht.
Well, that was a lot of words spent on something that is most likely not interesting to anybody but myself!
Anyhow, I will now install myself in front of the tv, snuggle up to Herman and watch Secret Millionaire. Gotta love that program!

Vacation

Today, or maybe tomorrow, is the first official day of our vacation. Not that we're going anywhere...a move and a trip to Ethiopia have depleted our wallets for now. But we are free from work for three glorious weeks! To celebrate Herman is now slouched lopsided on the sofa, snoring away.
I took a long bike ride with my Dad today which included farm lanes, a bicycle ferry, views of the lake, an old village, a museum, and more farm lanes, all within 30 kilometers (which was about the length of our round trip). No need to get bored in this area of Holland!

We will spend the coming weeks fixing up the garden, clearing out the attic, celebrating birthdays, having great friends over, going swimming, catching up on our photograph albums (so very very optimistic of us) and sleeping, sleeping and sleeping. Marinda will work at the ice cream place and I will manfully try to keep Tristan from spending too much time behind the computer and the tv. A battle I feel I have already lost.
I'm not sure how much I will be posting. Lately I've noticed it takes more effort than usual, and I feel I might be ranting and raving a bit too much. So I'm giving myself the leeway to blog if I feel like it, and not blog because I "must" (I mean, it's not like anyones life depends on me writing about whatever happens to hit my fancy!)

Now before I forget, I would like to praise my husband to the skies for being the very very handy man that he is. He took leftover laminate flooring from the bedrooms and transformed it into a huge desk/storage space in the attic (with lighting underneath!!). He bought a secondhand bookcase and rebuilt it to fit underneath the eaves of the attic. He hangs up stuff, fixes stuff and pretty much caters to our every handyman whim. I love him. (Ik hou van jou Herman!)

Have a good summer everyone!

Engagement

Herman asked me to marry him in Swahili. I was so surprised I didn't know how to say yes anymore! I hadn't expected him to officially ask me to marry him anymore. We had already written our engagement announcement (a poem written in english and dutch) and were celebrating our engagement with our family when he popped the question. It made the celebration extra special for me. Turns out he called the Kenyan embassy in Amsterdam and asked to speak to somebody who spoke Swahili. He then asked the man to teach him how to say "will you marry me". The man had a good laugh and then told him all :-)
We bought our engagement/wedding rings together as well and exchanged them at our engagement party (as you can see in the picture). At our wedding we put them on again, but this time on the right hand instead of the left. No going down on the knees and being presented with a ring here! Dutch "nuchterheid" at its best. Sometimes I pine for a bit more romance in my life, candles and surprise weekends away and gifts on Valentines day. But then I get a grip, take a good look at my husband and realize that we're doing pretty well without the extras. And when they do come (and I have a few poems to prove it!) it makes for some extra special moments.

Young Love

I was going to write about how I met Herman, only to find out that I already did so here. So there's no news there! But really I only wanted an excuse to show these cute picture of young love. Aren't we adorable??
The other day Herman dug up our box of photo albums looking for some pictures for his sisters upcoming wedding. I made use of the moment and took a number of pictures of the pictures so I could put them up here on my blog. Looking through them just now, I figured I could make a picture time line and intersperse my usual rantings and ravings with pictures of us through the years. I've even got some wedding shots!
These pictures were first in line. Young love, a couple of months into our relationship, romance blooming, presents and love letters flowing. (I still have most of those letters. Need to read them sometime soon and refresh the memories!).
My, aren't we young? Although Herman was 25 at the time, so not that young really. But anytime I see couples getting married who are just twenty I just really wonder what on earth those children are doing!?! I forget that I was that young as well, and I really thought I knew it all. HAH! Wisdom certainly comes with the years. It gives me shudders to think of Marinda getting married in 5 years time though. I wonder if I'll ever think she's adult enough to get married!

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A big thank you for the sympathetic reactions to yesterdays post!

Wonderful Hubby

How great is it to come home and find that the computer has found a home on an actual desk? To see boxes that used to contain lamps lying empty on the table? To see the counter empty of dishes and food preparations made? To see hubby carrying around tools and pieces of wood? To crash on the sofa and be offered a hot meal and cold drink? To find that the grocery shopping has been done?
Let me tell you, IT'S REALLY GREAT!!
Now I will go admire the rest of the work that he has done in Tristans room and give him a HUGE HUG.

(this is not our kitchen, but my moms, picture taken in Ethiopia!)
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currently reading Shake Hands for Ever by Ruth Rendell

YEEAAHHHHH!!

Two posts in one day!?!? What is the world coming to?
But this is to celebrate that I am sitting at home, with a fixed computer (fixed so well that we will soon be able move the computer to an actual desk instead of having to lean over the couch to type anything). So I thought that would be worth mentioning.
And I want to write at least a little bit about our weekend...

We went and saw The Kite Runner with free tickets that I had got through my work. On Sunday we took the train to Kampen and walked an art route. Basically people open up their houses and artists show off their work. Saw some fun stuff and some stuff that was just garbage. Had lunch in the sunshine (with our jackets on, but the SUN was there!).


Went shopping on saturday, trying desperately to find Herman some nice clothes for his sisters wedding. I DON'T LIKE SHOPPING! We had a long dinner on friday evening and did some major talking and got down to the depths of one of our differences without killing eachother in the process (tears were shed though). And we got some close personal time ;-) So methinks it was a succes!


I hope you can make some sense of the pictures. It took me forever to upload them, and I can't seem to get them to align properly!

16 years

16 years is how long Herman and I have been married. Today is our anniversary. Although that is up for discussion as we got married legally on april first and had our church wedding on april third! We always count the third as our "real" wedding day though.
In Holland a church wedding is not considered the legal wedding. So everyone has to have an official wedding ceremony and then add on the religious ceremony of choice. Usually this is done on one day, but we chose two because on the first of april we could get married for free and we wanted to place emphasis on our church wedding.
We organized our wedding by ourselves, made our own invitations, and decided on how we wanted our church service. It was a pretty low-key, low budet affair as I was still studying and Herman had only just started working so money was kind of short! I was so laid back about the whole thing that I even went to school to do an exam on the day between our ceremonies and I had a nap in the car on the way to our photo shoot on the day of our church wedding. My, I have had some people amazed at that! Some other day I will see if I can get some pictures of our young foolish selves posted on here!
One of the good habits that we picked up in the last 16 years is to go away for a weekend every year around our anniversary. So this weekend that is what we will be doing. So far we have gone to a different city in Holland each year, and then we fill our time with a bit of shopping, culture, sleep, food and sex (not neccesarily in that order ;-) ). And on the serious side, we often do a bit of evaluating and making goals for the next year or so.
So it might be silent here for the next couple of days! I will have to see if I can do without blogging (and checking who's lurking!) for a while.

Curtains!

Yes, we have curtains! And they're hanging up!
Today has been such a fruitful day in the house. We got a floor down (well, Herman did. I just handed him the floor boards and hung around trying to be helpful. Sometimes I succeeded). Herman fixed our bookcases so that the tv would fit in. He hung up the rails for the curtains. I ironed the first curtains and resolutely decided NOT to wash the second pair. No more ironing, thank you! I had to go buy a new iron because it had a layer of burnt gunge on it from ironing too many polyester clothes at the wrong temperature. (I sincerely hope other make this same mistake...)
Anyway, it gives a real sense of fulfilment to get some more things done around here. Sunday we're celebrating Tristans birthday and it will be nice to have people over in a house that we feel happy about!

Last day of work

Yesterday was my last day at work. Despite the fact that my manager couldn't be there to say goodbye to me, it was a good day. I got a lot of gifts, nice e-mails and a great speech. And knowing me with my love of compliments, it was as good as it gets! It felt strange though to leave a place that I've worked at for 6 years. And to leave a project that has become "mine" in so many ways. I still feel quite possesive of it though I think that will pass rather quickly with the distance that there is now! I took the time write a couple more e-mails after everybody had left and to consciously stand in my office and be aware of the fact that I was leaving. I can be really bad at goodbyes, moving on to new things really quickly, forgetting that it's not only something new I'm moving forward too, it's also something old that I'm leaving behind. But I think this went ok. No tears anyways!
Today we also hand over the keys to our old house. Then hopefully Herman and I will find some time to actually BE together in some significant way, instead of both rushing around doing anything but being together!

Life in general

Can't believe it's been so long since I last posted something. I find myself so tired that I can't think of what to write, that's part of the problem anyway. And if I want to keep this fun (which I do!) then I don't want this to turn into something I have to do. I'd rather just want to do it and enjoy the proces!
I figure it's about time we started planning our lives a bit more instead of just doing what happens to come by. That's my way of getting a grip on situations, to sit down and plan, make lists and DO something. Herman and I have hardly had any time to talk since we've moved. I mean conversation which reaches beyond the obligatory "how was your day". Time to pick up our date nights. I want to plan a sleepover with Marinda. She has a new big bed, so we'll get together and do something girly. And I want to do some major roughousing with Tristan. He doesn't like to cuddle so I have to pummel, push, tickle and poke him in order to give some form of "affection" which he's willing to accept. And I want to get back some structure into our meal times. It's always a lot more fun when we sit down at the table to eat at the same time instead of grabbing something and then eating in front of the tv. Easier said than done though, seeing as I have little cooking inspiration!
Enough on my list anyway. Right now I will go and see if I can make myself useful doing something in the house, that shouldn't be too hard!!

Dependence

This week I have been extremely aware of, and very annoyed by the amount of dependence that I have on Herman concerning the "masculine" issue of getting our house fixed up. I am a reasonably intelligent woman, I can paint a room, but I have no natural (or learned) ability for doing odd jobs around the house. That is Hermans department. And unfortunately there's a lot that needs to be done and not enough time to do it. So I walk around the house, washing dishes and hanging up laundry, fervently wishing that I could get that hammer and saw and whatever other tools that are needed to put down a laminate floor, put up shelves in the closet, put together some closets, place a shower and so forth and so on. Mind you, I'm not blaming him for anything, it's just so darned frustrating not to be able to do it myself! Makes me feel like a real wuss and it makes me feel like a walking cliche of an old-fashioned woman who is incapable of existing without a man. And it's doubly frustrating because at this point I have time on my hands and Herman is really busy with his new job. AARRGHHHH! I have an underlying annoyance as well (as if this isn't enough). It irritates me that all that is left to do in the house are things that I don't even like doing..... the housework. And even more irritating, they are all things that leave no lasting impression. Clothes get dirty and need to be washed, in contrast to putting down a floor, which will stay put down and give a lot of satisfaction. I feel like it's pretty unfair that I don't get a lot of that satisfaction!
Now I have to stop whinging, otherwise I'll just get myself more and more annoyed just thinking about it :-)

Sinterklaas evening

Another goodbye

Today was Hermans goodbye at work. He took the time and effort to write personal notes to all his direct colleagues and have the last ritual of coffee with cake with them. That's a very typical dutch thing on any momentous occassion. The one who's celebrating his birthday, departure, marriage, birth, drivers licence, or whatever, has to bring cake and then celebrate with the direct colleagues, preferably sitting in a circle. When at home, you do the same. The circle is a terrible thing. You get stuck next to people you neither know, or care to know, and then you have to spend the rest of the time making pleasant small talk with them! Many a birthday has been spent trying to get people out of the circle, but tradition must prevail at all costs...
But I digress... I was actually trying to tell about Hermans goodbye. He had a reception from his work (the same principle of the circle was repeated here, only the circle was big enough to contain about thirty people). I was invited too so I got to meet a lot of people from his work. Some of them for the first time. It doesn't sound very logical when I write it down. I mean why should I show up all of a sudden, when he's leaving? It's not like I was working there! I did enjoy it though. Lots of people showed up, he got a lot of gifts and people were very personal in wishing him the best. I enjoyed watching people enjoy him! He got a good sendoff and now has 5 weeks of vacation to look forward to. The weeks in Ethiopia will be peaceful (hopefully), the coming two weeks will be rushed. So glad he'll be home to bring some semblance of normality back to the house!

What a morning!

My goodness, I'm sitting here behind the computer still panting from a sprint to get ready for a soccer match. We overslept quite badly and were all rushing around to get ready. Then the phone rang and we found out that the opponent had cancelled the game. Now we can all turn back to normal again. I can now get undressed, take a shower, have breakfast and re-start the day in a less frantic state of mind.
I have to laugh though. Things like this often happen. I get into a tizzy and then something comes along and helps me calm down, or things don't turn out as bad as I think. This is a recurring theme in my life. I think I have to experience it until I learn that I don't have to get into a tizzy!

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Herman came home last night from one of his goodbye parties. He had a real good time and I couldn't help but feel jealous. And then I felt bad about myself for feeling jealous! I don't like to think of myself as being a person who can't enjoy other peoples pleasure, but always wants that pleasure for herself. But sometimes that kind of envy does pop up in me. So I look at Herman in different ways. In one way I see that my husband is enjoying himself, receiving a lot of praise for the work he's done. People are telling him they're going to miss him, there are farewell parties being planned, he's getting gifts from colleagues. And he's so calm and comfortable and relaxed and looking forward to the change! And the other part of me looks at all that and then gets sour and miserable wanting it for myself, and wonders if my life will ever pick up........ nasty old part of me!!
I'm thankful I can share it with Herman though and he's very understanding. He realizes that I don't have the same things to look forward to in our new home that he does. I'm so glad he doesn't get upset with me for being envious! Bless him for being big-hearted.

Lesson learned?

It took a drive back to our new town today to remind me of a lesson I had hoped I had learned! The thing is, I was really not too happy about the rental house that we looked at. The smallness and the location didn't agree with me. It felt almost claustrofobic to sign my name to the lease. So I decided I needed to go see the house one more time to see if that would help me change my mind. I asked one of my wisest friends to come with me.
On the drive over I was complaining about how bad I felt about the house, and yet that I also knew it was the only realistic option to take. She reminded me of something our therapist taught us, namely that you can choose to support something even if you don't feel quite comfortable with it. Like with raising kids for example. Herman and I often have different opinions about what is right and was is wrong and what kind of disciplinary actions need to be taken. We used to get into arguments about the differences. I always felt that I needed to agree with a disciplinary action in order to be able to put it into effect. But there's another way out of the dilemma. I can choose to support Hermans choice while not agreeing with it, especially if I see that it's something that's very important to him and not as important to me. Am I making sense? At any rate, it has helped me to look at our differences and how we deal with them with different eyes.
In the case of this house the conclusion is as follows. I choose to support everybodies wish to move to this house, even though it has its disadvantages. I don't have to force myself to like the house as much as the others do, I can still not be very happy with it, but my choice is to go along with this decision. It gives me tremendous peace of mind to do it like this!
So the decision is made, we'll be moving to our new rental house in January. Pictures will be posted as soon as we have decent ones. All offers of help will be greatly appreciated!!