Weight

Despite the fact that I wrote I have lost 15 kilos in the last year, weight still remains a HUGE issue in my life. It started during Marinda's pregnancy. I ate a lot then, partly because I was "eating for two" and naively thought I could get away with it, and partly to cover up a multitude of feelings that I was having.
After I gave birth to Marinda I was quite severely depressed for two years. I gained a lot of weight in that time and it became a really big deal. A big part of the years since then have been spent eating away a lot of issues instead of dealing with them.
That still happens to me regularly. I eat when I feel happy, eat when I feel sad, angry or dissappointed. Eating is very easy! One of the reasons that I finally managed to lose weight this time was because I got to the root of a certain issue and that finally helped me to get to grips with my weight as well.
I so wish that that would be end of my weight problem! Unfortunately it isn't. I still have to deal with myself, with who I am, and how I deal with things, and that means that sometimes I grab the candy, cookies, or whatever eatables are lying around the house and try to eat away the uncomfortable feeling that something is not quite right. Sometimes it seems a lot easier than actually dealing with the feelings. "Seems" is the key word in that last sentence!
Anyway, why I am writing this..... I'm not sure really. Probably because today was kind of hard because I saw a lot of bald kids, and because I saw where Hermans dream job is and I'm worried he won't get the job, because Marinda has been feeling sick for quite a while and I'm worried about her, because I'm tired of my job, and because I have PMS?
So now I've written it down, maybe I can keep myself from overeating the rest of the day!!

1 reacties:

Anonymous said...

Marit Didi this one was so nice and honest! Cracked me up at the end. I like your style of writing!
Joy-Desta
Don´t forget how proud I am of you!

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